A rock climber (Deep-voiced genre veteran Kevin Gage) chooses self-preservation over saving his friends whilst encountering problems on a climbing expedition. He was charged with murder and sent to the funny farm. Now three years later he is about to be released from the psych ward, though his schmuck shrink (Don McManus, in the film’s best performance) wants him to continue their sessions anyway. The shrink believes he made a choice that many others wouldn’t, but Gage disagrees..and sets about proving it. Enter a bunch of dopey college grads (heh, heh) on a weekend getaway at an isolated lake house. Via a video message, Gage informs his intended guinea pigs that they must kill each other off until one survivor is left, and that lucky person gets to live. If they do not comply, he’ll come and slice them all up. So it’s kill or be killed. Or killed. Well, unless they all split up and ran off in different directions…but no, wait, that would mean a horror film with a brain. My mistake. Taryn Manning, by the way, plays the trashy step-sister of one of the protagonists, and the object of the affections of the token fat loser (though at least his name isn’t Shelley).
With a better screenplay, this Chris Moore (apparently a producer making his directorial debut) horror film might’ve been something. Unfortunately, the screenplay by debutant Kelly Palmer is what it is, and what it is, isn’t really much at all at the end of the day. The characters lack any definition let alone the fact that they aren’t at all relatable, and unfortunately we spend too much time with them. Worse still, whilst I might have bought someone turning murderous on their friends, I didn’t buy it with these particular people. Sure, they’re unlikeable, beer-swilling, hard-partying jerks (like most young horror protagonists these days- but don’t let me get started on that!), but psychotic murderers? No way, and certainly not so easily. We need some indication that these guys at least have it in them to turn into homicidal nutters, otherwise I’m not buying it. If they were better written, that would be a plus, but they’re not and it is a crushing blow to the film. Maybe if the film focused on the killer (especially since he’s played by the always intimidating Kevin Gage) it might’ve worked, but he’s sadly barely seen at all. What we end up with is lots of standing around, way too much talking, arguing and debating, leading to me catching forty winks. Basically, it’s like an unofficial “Saw” sequel (i.e. A morality-based horror film with little sense of humour at all), minus the torture porn and Costas Mandylor. Oh, and message to Taryn Manning: Probably not best to wear a skimpy bikini when you’ve clearly got a beer belly. Yuck!
I will say this, though, Gage’s character is a little more interesting than Jigsaw. Jigsaw was just a pompous git trying to make a big sweeping statement about sin and being hypocritical about it (i.e. He kills people, albeit by proxy). This guy’s at least got a simple motivation, albeit he’s a psychologically damaged killer trying to justify his own depravity. But that makes him a little more interesting, as he’s trying to relive what he went through, his own actions that messed him up. He’s not trying to prove he’s better than everyone, he’s just trying to prove that everyone would do what he did, because he still can’t get over it.
But ultimately I just didn’t care. These characters suck and mostly blend into one another. The film also favours the near-B&W cinematography of many recent films, meaning that for the most part, faces are obscured. Unless the film actually is in B&W, it’s a technique I hate, because I need to see the whole faces, at least a majority of the time. The rest of the film is bathed blue/green filter garbage that I also loathe, so a curse on David Armstrong (“The Lodger”, “Skinwalkers”) for that. Meanwhile, the ending will make most people want to kill the director and screenwriter, ironically enough.
OVERALL SUMMARY
There’s nothing to see here folks, just another badly-written, generic horror film with no characters to relate to and way too much boring talk.
